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Masters Week

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    Masters Week






    DS addressed the ball on the first tee. He pulled his formidable gut inwards; he used this manoeuvre as a trigger mechanism to initiate his backswing. It meant it took a long time for the swing to commence. He carefully pulled the old persimmon Christy O' Connor back along the ground as far as it would go which was about as far as his left tit. He then stopped and addressed a snot on his left nostril with the sleeve of his faded Munster jersey, the one with the Bank of Ireland logoetched on the front, shrunken by many washes, assaulted by numerous fag burns and beer stains but still his pride and joy. He then completed his backswing after hitching his trousers, the one he still hadfrom the 70's,with the purple, green, yellow and pink polka dot/check pattern. ( the ones like Jack Nicklaus had in his prime).


    At the top of his backswing, he then waggled his corpulent hips to initiate the downswing; the 8 inches of belt trailing from the buckle bobbed up and down suggestively, in unison with the 8 cm inside his pants. A little cock of the head to the right (a la Jack nicklaus, of course) followed by a ferocious hip drive causing his trouser legs to shoot upwards, revealing the white Adidastrainer socks above the black rubber golf shoes (one with laces). Then, the customary release of wind from any available orifice, the clubhead whizzing unerringly toward the Dunlop 65, a sudden gasp from the crowd as the club slid from his hands andsoared towards the gallery on the left...


    A small stocky man approaching him from the distance with deathly pallor, swinging a niblick and shouting at DS. For f**ks sake, Bobby Jones arisen from the grave...


    With that DS fell out of bed and swore to himself that he would never drink Jack Daniels again. He rang reception for the usual full Irish with extra black pudding (only Clonakilty of course) and a pot of extra strong black coffee.....



    #2
    Right lads and lassies who's going to win? I'll jump in the deep end and go for Tiger!

    Comment


      #3
      I'd like to see someone else beside a Yank win it. I won about 600 lids a few years ago with an e/w on Mike Weir and Mickleson.[img]smileys/cool.gif[/img]
      The Beatings Will Continue Until Morale Improves

      Comment


        #4





        Place your bets


        http://www.paddypower.com/bet?action...t_by_markets&a mp;chosen_ev_id=688812&chosen_ev_mkt_id=-1
        Anybody who sees a psychiatrist would want their head examined.*&nb sp;Henry Ford

        Comment


          #5


          Mickelson is a decent each-way bet at either 6/1 or 7/1 depending on bookie, because of his record the last few years.


          In Theory Harringtons steady game and analytical, patient demenour suggests he should do well plus he has played Augusta often enough to be a contender,





          My outsider is Luke Donald, good swing excellent attitude


          ...no charge for the tips[img]smileys/cool.gif[/img]

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            #6
            My older brother was there for 2 practice days this week.

            He says the undulations are much more severe than they look on tv, the greens are "stupidly" fast, and that the fairways are wider than Dellboy and his extended family combined.

            I will take a real punt from left centre field - Henrik Stenson. He hits it miles.

            Comment


              #7


              Originally posted by Dermot G
              My older brother was there for 2 practice days this week.

              He says the undulations are much more severe than they look on tv, the greens are "stupidly" fast, and that the fairways are wider than Dellboy and his extended family combined.

              I will take a real punt from left centre field - Henrik Stenson. He hits it miles.

              He missed the cut last year, but I agree with you, he is on fire at the moment and should make his length off the tee count. If he can break even on the Par 4 and 3's and scores heavy on the Par 5 (2nd, 8th, 13th, 15th if I remember correctly), he should be there or there abouts.....QED....yeah right!


              Otherwise, I reckon Chad Campbell will come from the pack to take his first major. HArrington will do well to make the cut...
              Romani ite Domun

              Comment


                #8
                For my Outsider I am going with Vaughan Taylor,fabulous putter,not sure about his temperament,probably explains why he was 150/1.Olazabal loves the course and knows what it takes to win there.
                I distrust Camels and anybody else that go for 7 days without a drink

                Comment


                  #9
                  My outsider is Stuart Appleby at 160/1 on betfair. He was 2nd last week.

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Good player Appleby. Has a chance. Not sure his short game is good enough though.

                    Any thoughts on Paul Casey or Luke Donald? We are well overdue a European major winner.


                    Comment


                      #11
                      I think Casey is playing with Tiger,should be interesting.
                      I distrust Camels and anybody else that go for 7 days without a drink

                      Comment


                        #12
                        I have money on Garcia, Harrington and Appleby. The 1st two are just a habbit I have in any major, Garcia has to come through at some stage and Harrington, well I just dont know with him anymore.

                        Donald doesnt have the length for it I dont think, does Casey have the putting or the temperament?

                        Comment


                          #13

                          Originally posted by epaddy
                          I have money on Garcia, Harrington and Appleby. The 1st two are just a habbit I have in any major, Garcia has to come through at some stage and Harrington, well I just dont know with him anymore.

                          Donald doesnt have the length for it I dont think, does Casey have the putting or the temperament?
                          BBC compared Donald to Faldo last night. He's very accurate. Not massively long but not short either. He has a chance. Mike Weir is considerably shorter.

                          Casey is a streaky player. Duck or no dinner. He is a massive hitter.

                          Comment


                            #14


                            Originally posted by epaddy
                            I have money on Garcia, Harrington and Appleby. The 1st two are just a habbit I have in any major, Garcia has to come through at some stage and Harrington, well I just dont know with him anymore.

                            Donald doesnt have the length for it I dont think, does Casey have the putting or the temperament?

                            I think Garcia's putting is too suspect. He has a fine game otherwise. I fancy Harrington or Stenson as possible European winners.

                            Comment


                              #15
                              Harrington hasn't the consistancy I fear. Clarke isn't good enough.

                              Monty could be a good outside bet. Pressure is off him.

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