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Tinky-Winky DEAD!

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    Tinky-Winky DEAD!

    1990s TV favourite Tinky-Winky has been found
    dead in a bed-sit in Hastings, Sussex. His body was discovered
    surrounded by empty tequila bottles and a variety of illegal and
    prescription drugs. The television had still not been switched off and
    in the video machine was a tape of the popular TV programme that was
    cancelled five years ago precipitating Tinky Winky’s catastrophic
    descent into depression and alcoholism.

    As one of the four Tellytubbies who recorded over three hundred and
    fifty programmes during their domination of children’s TV in the late
    1990s, Tinky Winky was one of the biggest TV stars in the country.
    Their 1997 song ‘Tellytubbies Say Eh-oh’ reached number one, selling
    over a million copies, while their catchphrases ‘Eh-oh Po!’ and ‘Run
    Away!’ spoke for a whole new generation.

    However behind the scenes the pressures of their superstardom was
    taking it’s toll. After he was was introduced to cocaine by Mrs Goggins
    from Postman Pat, Tinky Winky’s behaviour became increasingly erratic.
    Following an assault upon La-La outside a lap-dancing club in London,
    the BBC finally decided it could no longer sustain the myth of the
    Tellytubbies as the innocent toddler’s friends, and the show was
    suddenly pulled in 2001.

    Successive attempts at comebacks had fizzled out, but while the other
    three Tellytubbies had had limited success in their subsequent careers
    as after dinner speakers, Tinky Winky took the news particularly badly.
    In 2004 he was arrested for drink-driving, telling his arresting
    officer he was on his way ‘to run over the f**king controller of
    BBC-1.’ He was last seen alive last Tuesday by a pizza delivery man.

    Plans for yet another Tellytubbies comeback tour have been put on hold
    following the news. Promoters have approached Tilly from Tots TV about
    the possibility of her stepping into the breach, although it is unclear
    whether any remaining Tellytubby fans would be able to accept a Tot in
    a role that Tinky Winky had made very much his own.

    Speaking from his home in Bray, Berkshire, fellow ex-Tellytubby Dipsy
    was overcome with emotion at the news. ‘I am shocked and saddened. I’ve
    not spoken to the other guys, but I know they will feel the same way.
    Tinky Winky was a one-off, a huge talent, a show-business giant, a
    genius. I only hope people will try to remember him at his peak, waving
    at the camera saying ‘Eh-oh!’, and not think about him sitting in his
    flat watching hard-core pornography while out of his head on crack


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      I thought this was about John Gilligan.
      The Beatings Will Continue Until Morale Improves


        Epaddy - where the f*ck do you find 'em? Very worrying - even for a Ladyboy!
        Trust is good; control is better. V I Lenin.