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    Funny News Stories ectid=10424667

    Proud teenager blown away by the Lynx effect

    5:00AM Monday February 19, 2007

    A teenager's new car exploded when he used deodorant spray to polish his dashboard and then lit a cigarette, igniting the aerosol's fumes.

    Jayme Edmonds suffered burns and spent three days in Rotorua Hospital and nine more days off school recovering after the blast in his uninsured $3000 vehicle.

    The doors blew out and the windows shattered - the windscreen was found metres away down the driveway of his home.

    Joanne Edmonds, mother of 16-year-old Jayme, said her family had been traumatised by the incident.

    Jayme had gone to his car just before midnight - dressed only in his boxer shorts - to have a cigarette and listen to his stereo. In the car were two bottles of Lynx deodorant. "All my mates use it, we all take it around in cars. Others use Impulse," said the Western Heights High School student.

    Both bottles had been left in the car, in the hot sun, all day.

    Jayme's Honda Prelude was a recent purchase and he was worried about some paint stains on the inside door. He began spraying from the aerosol can on to the car and rubbing the stains off with a towel, he said.

    "Then I lit the smoke and this big ball of fire went up.

    "I knew my hands were burned because I picked up this towel to try to save my stereo, only the towel was on fire. It was a blur. I just remember all the heat coming up my body."

    The explosion shattered two windows of his father's van parked about 3m away and woke up the neighbourhood. "I've never heard anything so loud in my life," Mrs Edmonds said.

    @@@@SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold">Jayme singed his hair, eyebrows and nostrils@@@@/SPAN>, but it was about half an hour before he realised the extent of his injuries.

    His mother took him to hospital, where he ended up on an oxygen machine in intensive care.

    Unilever Australasia spokesman Nick Goddard said the deodorant was clearly marked "highly flammable".

    "@@@@SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold">Lynx is designed to attract members of the opposite sex, but not in this way@@@@/SPAN>. We hope the young man is not too seriously hurt."


    That gut should not be let near anything, ever again[img]smileys/razz.gif[/img]


      They breed them special down that part of the world. That right Wayen? [img]smileys/lol.gif[/img][img]smileys/razz.gif[/img]
      <a href=\"\" target=\"_blank\">

      If you’re fat stay in the ruck - Liam Toland


        Just shows a new way how smoking can damage your health[img]smileys/redface.gif[/img]
        Is it only a game?
        And its Thomond Park NOT Thomond


          scary ......
          \"As she lay there dozing next to me, one voice inside my head kept saying, \'Relax, you\'re not the first doctor to sleep with one of his patients\', but the another kept reminding me, \' you are a veterinarian!\'\"



            Originally posted by seanp
            Just shows a new way how smoking can damage your health[img]smileys/redface.gif[/img]

            Especially for 16 year olds[img]smileys/shock.gif[/img]


              @@@@SPAN =post>"When the constable arrived at the house", Detective Inspector Bernie Hollewand told a press conference in Auckland, "he found a heated domestic dispute taking place between a husband, his wife, and their teenage son. After remonstrations with the couple proved futile, he decided to use his Taser weapon to disable the man. But unfortunately these electronic stun guns are still in the trial stages among frontline police in Auckland and Wellington. They're a little wobbly, and we occasionally experience problems with them.

              "His first 50,000 volt shot from the Taser missed the husband and hit the cat, killing it outright. The second hit the teenage son, knocking him to the ground. A futher shot also missed the target, and when the constable tried to remove the Taser's spent cartridges, he forgot to wait for the five-second discharge cycle to complete, and inadvertently blasted himself with another 50,000 volts. When he had recovered and reloaded, he fired two further shots, both of which hit the ceiling.

              "At this point, he abandoned the Taser and took out his pepper spray in another attempt to disable the husband. Unfortunately, this too missed its target, and instead disabled the couple's twenty-one-year-old daughter who had just entered the room. Luckily, at this point the husband decided to give himself up, and an arrest was made".

              From: Otago Daily Times, 18-19/11/06.@@@@/SPAN>


                Excellence is hard to keep quite - Sherrie Coale


                  [img]smileys/lol.gif[/img] (loudly).


                    that is hilarious [img]smileys/lol.gif[/img][img]smileys/lol.gif[/img]poor cat
                    \"As she lay there dozing next to me, one voice inside my head kept saying, \'Relax, you\'re not the first doctor to sleep with one of his patients\', but the another kept reminding me, \' you are a veterinarian!\'\"




                      Chinese man gets death for ant-breeding scam

                      BEIJING (Reuters) - A Chinese man has been sentenced to death for conning people out of 3 billion yuan ($387 million) in a giant scam to breed ants, local media said Thursday.

                      Wang Zhendong, from the northeastern province of Liaoning, fabricated a business purported to be making wine, tea and medical elixirs using mature ants, the Beijing News said.

                      In parts of China, black ants are sold by the bagful to be steeped in tea or soaked in liquor as a natural remedy for ailments such as arthritis.

                      Wang sold packages of ants to the investors for up to as much as 10,000 yuan ($1,290) when they were only worth 200 yuan, China Central Television reported.

                      More than 10,000 people, lured by the promise of returns of up to 60 percent, signed 100,000 contracts with Wang's bogus company before the case came under investigation in June 2005.

                      Investigators could only recover 10 million yuan of the money raised by Wang, the Beijing News said. One investor was so distraught at losing his money he killed himself, the newspaper said.

                      Fifteen managers of the company were jailed for between five and 10 years and fined between 100,000 and 500,000 yuan, Xinhua news agency said.

                      In his defense, Wang said he did not know the first thing about raising ants and was "quite unclear" about the costs, the Beijing News said.

                      Wang spent 798 million yuan on himself, paying off personal debts and lending money to other people, it added.



                        As if going to the dentist wasnt bad enough. [img]smileys/smiley38.gif[/img]
                        <DIV ="small color-666">March 22, 2007
                        <DIV =clear-simple></DIV>
                        <H1 =ing>Dentist 'used instruments to clean his ears'</H1>
                        <H2 ="sub-ing padding-top-5 padding-bottom-15"></H2><!- END: Module - Main ing ->
                        <DIV id=regi&#111;n-column1-layout2><!-CMA user Call Diffrenet Variati&#111;n Of Image -><!- BEGIN: Module - M24 Article line with no image (a) -><!-set value for print friendly -><!- getting the secti&#111;n url from article. This has been d&#111;ne so that correct url is
                        generated if we are coming from a secti&#111;n or topic -><!- Print Author name associated with the article ->
                        <DIV id=main-article>
                        <DIV =article-author><!- Print Author name from By Line associated with the article ->@@@@SPAN =small>@@@@/SPAN>@@@@SPAN =byline>David Rose @@@@/SPAN>
                        <DIV =clear></DIV></DIV></DIV><!- END: Module - M24 Article line with no image -><!- Article Copy module -><!- BEGIN: Module - Main Article -><!- Check the Article and display accordingly-><!- Print Author image associated with the Author-><!- Print the of the article-><!- Paginati&#111;n ->

                        A dentist stands accused of extremely poor hygiene after allegedly cleaning his nails and ears with equipment meant for sterilised use on patients.

                        Alan Hutchinson of Batley, West Yorkshire, is due to appear before a disciplinary hearing accused of urinating in a sink at his surgery and putting used drill “burrs” back with sterilised ones where there was a danger they could be reused on patients before being sterilised.

                        It is alleged that these incidents took place between 1978 and June 2006.

                        The allegations were listed on a General Dental Council (GDC) website announcing that the hearing is to be held next month. Dr Hutchinson faces charges of unprofessional conduct and acting “contrary to the best interests of patients and dental nurses”.<!-#include ="m63-article-related-attachements."->

                        It is also alleged that he failed routinely to wear gloves for clinical treatment and failed to wash his hands between treating patients. One patient is alleged to have complained in 1999 about “poor hygiene” to Dr Hutchinson, who is alleged to have responded “in a flippant manner”.

                        British Dental Association (BDA) guidelines state that surgeries should disinfect reusable instruments such as drills and probes using a detergent wash or ultrasonic cleaner before sterilising them.

                        A spokeswoman for the GDC said: “If the professional misconduct committee find that Dr Hutchinson’s fitness to practise was impaired, he could be suspended or barred from practising dentistry.”

                        The hearing is due to open at the beginning of next month.</DIV>
                        How come when Peter Parker was bitten by a radioactive spider he gained superpowers yet when Alexander Litvinyenko ate some sushi laced with polonium he lost his hair and died? Once again it\'s one rule for comic book superheroes and another for KGB turncoats.


                          When I was in national school, the headmaster often used to pick up a pen or pencil from a pupils desk, clean out his ear with it, and then put the pen back down on the desk without cleaning it.





                            <TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 width=629>
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                            <DIV =sh>Web revellers wreck family home </DIV></DIV></TD></TR>
                            <TD vAlign=top width=416><!- S BO -><!- S IIMA ->
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                            <DIV =cap></DIV></DIV></TD></TR></T></TABLE><!- E IIMA -><!- S SF ->About 200 youngsters caused damage put at £20,000 to a family home after a party organised on a website.

                            Police said a teenage girl used the social networking site MySpace to advertise the party while her parents were away from home on Easter Monday.

                            The 17-year-old's mother has described the party as "house rape" and called the revellers "worse than animals".

                            Guests urinated on a wedding dress and stole jewellery from the house in Houghton-le-Spring, County Durham. <!- E SF ->

                            'Absolutely trashed'

                            Some party-goers also swung from ceiling light fittings, stubbed out cigarettes on the carpet, vomited in buckets throughout the house and barricaded the back door to prevent neighbours from intervening.

                            <!- S I ->
                            <TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 width=208 align=right>
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                            <TD =sibtbg>
                            <DIV></DIV></TD></TR></T></TABLE><!- E I ->

                            The girl's parents returned on Tuesday morning to find the trail of destruction at their £230,000 house in Chipchase Court.

                            They have now made a formal complaint of criminal damage to police.

                            The sixth former's 48-year-old mother, who does not want to be identified, said: "I told her that I did not want any kids or drink in the house while I was away and I'm furious.

                            "It's worse than a burglary, I can't believe it.

                            "Whoever has come in here are worse than animals, it's like house rape."

                            She said her daughter, who has denied creating the message on the website, was now staying with friends for a "cooling off" period.

                            'Traumatic' experience

                            The youngster had expected 30 or 40 guests but 200 turned up.

                            Her father said the experience had been traumatic.

                            "It's absolutely trashed, and I hope no-one else has to go through what me and my wife have these last few days."

                            A Durham Police spokesman said some people travelled hundreds of miles to be at the party.

                            He said: "There has been a formal complaint from the owners of criminal damage to interior fixtures and fittings.

                            "Inquiries are under way and we plan to speak in due course to as many of the party-goers as we can." </TD></TR></T></TABLE>




                              Drunk deposits horse in bank for night

                              BERLIN (Reuters) - A German man called on his bank for an unusual service when he was too tired and drunk to go home - he bedded down there for the night with his horse.

                              The man, identified as Wolfgang H. by German media, went to sleep next to cash machines in the local branch of the Mittelbrandenburgische Sparkasse in Wiesenburg southwest of Berlin after unsaddling his horse Sammy and closing the door.

                              A spokeswoman for the bank said that aside from an undesirable deposit made by his horse inside the building, the 40-year-old account holder had not breached any house rules.

                              "The horse was otherwise very well behaved and kept a good watch on his master," she said Wednesday. "Perhaps we should have a supply of oats and water on the premises in future."

                              Another customer discovered the horse and rider as he slept and informed police, who asked the man to leave.

                              A police spokesman said that since the horse's droppings had been removed, the matter was now closed.