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Guide to Croker 2007

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    Guide to Croker 2007

    doing the rounds on the email......

    For those of you who missed the Neil Diamond concerts in Croke Park, here is a short guide for Munster Supporters/Leinster Spectators to accessing and enjoying the Croke Park area.

    People traveling from D4 and the Borough can avail of the Dort (honestly it does go passed Lansdowne Road!). Amiens Street (now known as Connolly) is the closest station, but entails a walk through the North inner city – about as safe as Sallynoggin. If you choose to take this route, try to walk close to some Limerick men. For the timid, Clontarf Road might be a better option. The walk is slightly longer, but altogether more pleasant. You can saunter along Fairview Strand and make inane jokes like “Strand, Jurry, but where’s the sea? Ho Ho Ho”. Then walk on towards Ballybough (rhymes with Springbok, not Holly Bough) and turn into Clonliffe Road. Please do not allow yourself to become disoriented if you see people walking around in Pyjamas and Slippers. This is what they do; you are not six hours early! Just pretend it’s Rag Week and you should be okay. Do consider stopping for a refreshment in any of the excellent bars along this route, but please bear in mind that there is an inverse relationship between the price of a pint and your safety and remember; never ever ever order a Gin and Tonic if you are not in the company of a female. If you are offered drugs, check out the prices, you will find them considerably cheaper than those to which you are used.

    Thinking of driving? Drive to a Dort Station. If you choose to ignore this advice, parking is often available in the grounds of the Catholic Seminary, but be warned they can smell a Prod at 200 metres. Also take care to avoid all junctions humourously referred to as “Handbag Corner” (any junction with traffic lights).

    Munster Fans:
    Cork – the airport is only up the road.
    Limerick – take the Luas from Hueston to Connolly.
    Tipperary – follow the lads from Cork or Kerry, they’ll know where they are going.

    On getting to the Stadium.
    Brush up on your Irish: Ardan means Stand, Gin Mor agus Tonic is a large Gin and Tonic
    Fogra means announcement, not a French delicacy, but why not nudge Durmut in the ribs and shout “he can’t even pronounce Fwah grah”. It will make everyone near you feel much more at home.

    Avoid standing out from the crowd; GAA is clearly pronounced jee-ay-ay. Using the more common forms; jee-ee-ay or jee-ah-ah could suggest a form of “going native” and will only result in unbridled scorn from your companions.

    Also beware of the Belvos looking over the back wall of the Cusack Stand, boring you with the “that used to be ours you know”. Please contain the urge to pitch them over the edge; there might be decent folk below.

    PS sadly there is no truth in the rumour that the Wanderers tickets are with the Local Residents freebies. It was felt the residents are suffering enough already
    Where to “Meet the lads”?
    DNS Tourism has designated the following pubs as meeting points to help our visitors from the South side enjoy the pre and post game banter in the company of their club-mates.

    Bective Rangers - McGrath’s. A nice well behaved bar, popular with locals and less noticeable than it’s near neighbour. One word of caution, it would be no harm to omit the “Rangers” part of your name from any conversations, particularly with the locals – just in case.

    Blackrock - The Big Tree. Noisy and Brash – a perfect match.

    DLSP – atmosphere a little heavy at sea level The Hideout House, Just like Kilternan, this place is very hard to find, although unlike Kilternan, it is worth finding.

    Dublin University – Is the Pav not open?

    Greystones - Gills Corner House. As ye travelleth the farthest so ye shall sup closest the ground.

    Lansdowne - The Hogan Stand. No, not the stand in Croke Park, this is a pub on the NCR (North Circular Road). You shoul
    Seas suas agus troid!

    Im getting a strangeimage of the english supporters on the walk from connolly, viking helmets and all.
    Anybody who sees a psychiatrist would want their head examined. &nb sp;Henry Ford


      And what of quinns?? How's anyone suppose to go to croker and not head to quinns for the obligatory pint of p**s? Or would that be a tad too GAA (jee-ay-ay[img]smileys/lol.gif[/img]) for some of them southsiders?


        How will Tipp men actually recognize these Cork and Kerry types we are supposed to folly? Better not folly the Limerick shower anyway, sure they're sure to wander around lost.
        Hello friends in Brussels. Baldy here :_surrender__revampe



          Originally posted by Clubman
          How will Tipp men actually recognize these Cork and Kerry types we are supposed to folly?

          They'll be the lads eating the hang sang's outta the boot of the car.
          It happened, and I was there.
          4.48pm, Saturday 20th May 2006.
          What does grease taste like? Is it like chicken?


            An don't fergetde flask of tay too Ballyman



              Originally posted by Clubman
              How will Tipp men actually recognize these Cork and Kerry types we are supposed to folly? Better not folly the Limerick shower anyway, sure they're sure to wander around lost.

              Sure if we get lost all we have to do is follow the tin foil. [img]smileys/lol.gif[/img]
              "Isn't it enough to see that a garden is beautiful without having to believe that there are fairies at the bottom of it too ?" - Douglas Adams



                Its a disgarce, 30 young fellas throwing an egg backwards aropund a GAA temple, its a fkn disgrace i tells ye
                Im here to spread the word..common sense is not just for animals